I Did It!!!

Oh my goodness there is just so much to write about! I have been through so much physically and emotionally and I am ecstatic to share it with all of you! The day we have been waiting for finally came this past Thursday October 18th, 2012 our son, Baby Soybean aka Onyx Geoffrey was born! I believe the last I wrote was about false labor and being frustrated... well that's how real labor sort of began :)

I'm not sure of the exact time the contractions started because it was the wee hours of Thursday morning. I wrote them off and went back to sleep even though they were strong enough to wake me up each time. I didn't bother waking up Andy because I figured they would just go away on their own again. So, all night I would wake up go back to sleep, wake up go back to sleep. Around 6:30am the alarm clock went off and Andy got up to go get ready as usual for his morning routine. I noticed as I woke up that the contractions were in a regular pattern, they also felt very different. This time they felt a lot more like period pain rather than anything else. So I decided to tell Andy how I was feeling. Of course he felt the same way I did what if this isn't the real deal and we "waste" another day off from work. My suggestion was for me to call in and tell work what was going on and tell them if it was false I would come in for a half day. Since Andy doesn't have to be at work until 9am he could just hang out with me for a few hours and see how things looked and then we could make the final judgement call. That's what we did. We went downstairs and started counting contractions. They were about 4 mins apart and were semi intense but nothing I couldn't talk through or deal with. As the morning went on they stayed in their pattern and were getting more intense. I decided to call Amy (our midwife) and let her know what was going on. As she talked to me on the phone she told me this sounded like the real deal this time and to keep her posted as to if anything changed. So we stayed at home and kept doing what we were doing. Slowly contractions got harder but still nothing I couldn't talk through or deal with. So, around 3pm I decided to take a shower because I had lost a second mucus plug was starting to bleed somewhat and had some awful diarrhea. I decided that a shower could only help me to feel better. Andy for a while now has been staying in the bathroom with me when I shower to help me in and out of the tub so I don't fall. He came in the bathroom and told me he wasn't going to worry about counting the contractions in the shower we'd just start again once I got out. As we were talking while I was showering, I would tell Andy every time I would have a contraction just to inform him. After a few minutes he said he thought that I had had a lot of contractions in a very short span. I just thought nah I don't think so. I got out of the shower, which by the way the shower water really helped to cope with the contractions. They had started getting stronger and the warm water hitting my belly just gave such relief to the strong sensations I was feeling. I decided to lay down in our bed for a little while because the contractions were getting so much stronger and I just felt the need to rest up. I laid down in our bed and had stronger and stronger contractions. Eventually I didn't feel like I could lay down and take them anymore, I needed to move. So, I got up and told Andy I wanted to hold onto him and do the birthing dirty dance I mentioned in a few blog posts back. I started doing these during the contractions and all of a sudden they became extremely intense. It was starting to hurt now. No more being completely silent besides breathing heavy when a contraction hit. Andy started watching the clock and realized they were coming every minute and lasting a minute long! He told me it was time to go, he was going to go put the stuff in the car and I was to call Amy and let her know that in just a few short minutes my contractions had gone from 4 mins apart to every 1-2 and I could no longer talk through them. I called her and her advice was definitely its time to get to the birthing center so she could check my cervix for progress. I must say, the car ride to the birthing center was absolutely terrible! Having intense contractions and being forced to sit in a car seat with a seatbelt on is awful! I hated that part. Poor Andy was telling me to close my eyes so I wouldn't see all the traffic lights we were having to stop at haha :). We finally made it to the center. Contractions were getting worse and I had them walking into the center, walking down the hall, and getting up on her exam table. I was definitely moaning at this point while trying to breathe properly. It felt like super intense period pain and it was gearing up. She got me on the exam table to check my cervix. She told me I was at 3cm. I couldn't believe it... only 3cm?!?! We still have 7cm to go and these contractions are this bad?!?! She also told me the baby's head was turned at an angle and that could be contributing to all the pain. So she got her birthing ball for me to sit on. She said it could open up my pelvis and get his head to turn. I sat on the ball in her exam room and had one after the other hard contractions. She was talking to us during all of this and she said she knew it wasn't what we wanted to hear but I was still early and she thought maybe we should go home. I just sat there thinking oh my god are we really still that early?? We've been laboring all day, I mean I realize it hasn't been hard except the last few times here but really!?! I had some more contractions and soon Amy realized we probably didn't need to leave. She told me they were so strong and close together she would feel better if we stayed. So Andy brought in all the stuff and she started showing me techniques to get the baby's head to turn. One was to stand against the wall with my hands pressed against the wall for balance and rotate only my hips during a contraction in a big open circle. We tried that and it was so painful I couldn't do that. She kept pushing me though, pressing up against my legs to make my circle bigger even though I was in horrible pain from doing those circles. She got Andy to push me too and I just tried to breathe through them but circles made each already super intense contraction 10x worse. I was starting to get nauseous at this point during each contraction. The contractions were squeezing my stomach and I thought with each one I would vomit. I kept screaming for the trash can but I never did throw up! She showed me more techniques for moving his head. Another one was to stand against the wall with my back to the wall and when a contraction came to pull up extremely hard on my stomach to pull the baby off of my pubic bone. I did that and it was crippling how much that technique hurt! I told her I couldn't possibly do that one! We tried more hip circles on the birthing ball and I then asked if it was supposed to hurt worse when I did the hip circles. She said unfortunately yeah it is because you're moving that baby's head around it's going to hurt. She then offered one last technique. She said side laying on the bed with lots of pillows in between your legs would really open up the pelvis and could cause the baby to move. I decided that sounded WAY better than the other techniques so I said yeah let's try it. I laid down and the contractions started getting more intense. She told Andy he should go get some dinner since it was dinner time and she would stay with me. So Andy left and she stayed and worked me through each contraction. She asked me if I could sleep in between, I said maybe because I was so tired at this point. She said well definitely try to sleep in between if you can even if its just dosing. I did that but they were coming so close together those doses were extremely short. Andy came back soon with a Subway sandwich for him and some apple juice for me. I thought I wanted juice but I had become so nauseous I didn't want anything near me food wise. Amy told Andy that she was going to run home and eat dinner too but that she lives right behind the birthing center. She said if anything changed for Andy to call her but for now just sit with me and go through each contraction together. After she left that's when I say the worst part started. Contractions at that point hurt. I will not lie to you it hurt. It hurt really bad when one would come and I would just yell out Andy's name during the contraction over and over. I told him later I did that because I wanted him to make it stop. I was doubting myself that I could do it and I just wanted it to end. He would lean over the bed and hug me while I was having them and try to breathe the way I was supposed to, to get me to imitate him. I tried but I just couldn't breathe properly through them. I had to pee so much during all of this too and I was convinced that each contraction on the toilet was worse than any in the bed. I would go to pee and a contraction would happen and I would say I HAVE TO GET OFF THIS TOILET! hahaha :). Then when I would stand up I was convinced it hurt more to stand. It was the most intense pain I have ever felt in my life. I can understand why when offered to get out of the pain women do because it is so difficult to trust your body at that point. You are so emotionally vulnerable at that point because physically you are doing the most challenging thing of your life! Andy was awesome though, he kept holding me and hugging me and telling me I was doing great and just being there for me. He deserves husband of the year award! I soon realized that I was having contractions that were making me involuntarily push. I didn't know how else to explain that but I just felt like I was pushing and Andy said he could hear it in my voice when I would have the contraction. That's when Amy came back from her dinner. She came in and I told her I felt like I was involuntarily pushing. She said ok let's check your cervix that's sign of progression. I laid back thinking she was about to give me news like I hadn't progressed very far or something but when she checked me she started laughing. I said what's funny?? She said girl it's everything, you're at 10 cm!!! I said oh my god are you serious?!?! She smiled so big and said YES I'm serious you just went from a 2 to a 10 in a an hour and half! I said a 2? She said yeah I stretched the truth a little when you first came in you were barely at 2cm but I didn't want you to be discouraged, I could push your cervix to a 3 with my fingers but you were really around 2. I looked up at her and I said its time to start pushing right? She said yep. That's when I said OH THANK GOD! I was ready to push I wanted to meet my baby and be done with labor. She set everything up that she needed for the pushing stage and told me to sit back in a reclined position and when a contraction came to hold my breathe and push down like I was going to take a massive poop on the bed. That's when my water broke! She reached in to start seeing how far the baby's head had descended and KAPOW! It went everywhere! Like a water balloon busting. It made all three of us laugh. So I started pushing. At first I couldn't keep my air in I would let the breath out as I pushed but soon I got the hang of it. Each contraction I would push around 3 times. Then in between contractions was a resting time. I LOVED pushing! It felt incredible to finally be able to do something productive during labor. She and Andy would push my legs back as I was pushing to give my leverage. She also did a lot of perineal massage during the pushing to stretch me out and was putting olive oil on me to soften up my perineum and vagina. She soon recommended side laying to push because I got stronger urges that way. I pushed that way for a while then she had me lay flat on my back. She said that she could see the head now without me pushing. Andy had told her earlier that he wanted to catch so she told him he needed to come around to her because we were about to have the baby. I forgot to mention she would periodically take pictures to let me see my progress and at one point got me a mirror so I could see what I was working towards. She told me to reach down and feel the baby's head, when I did I started crying. All of a sudden it was real there was actually a baby coming out of me and it was only going to be a few more minutes. When the baby's head got down into the canal it was intense pressure. Not painful just the weirdest pressure I have ever felt. Andy said I was wide eyed the whole time saying "oh my god oh my god I can feel the head in the canal" hahaha. As I pushed to get the head out it burned. I told her it's burning it's burning and she said that's normal its stretching. I pushed through the burn and she told me to stop pushing to just breathe through it because his head was coming out. I did and his head emerged. Andy started crying he said "oh my god honey the baby's head is out!". She told me to push again and I started pushing. With two more pushes I felt my son slide out and he was here!!! Andy caught him and Amy got all the mucus out of his mouth and nose and Andy put him up on my stomach. That was absolutely the most amazing feeling ever. I had birthed out my son without intervention through nothing but love and dedication and he was here! I couldn't believe how much love swooped over me as I looked at this beautiful baby boy laying on my stomach. I just laid there and stared at him, I was crying and smiling and just the happiest person on the planet! Andy soon cut the cord and I was able to hold my little boy on my chest. It was transformative. We were parents and it was the greatest feeling ever. Amy let us enjoy him for a little while before coming and saying she needed to weigh him and get his measurements etc. Andy went with her to do all of that and I just laid there just so excited that I had done it! I had doubted myself in the extremely hard part of labor but I had done it! They came back in the room and she started seeing if my placenta was ready to come out. I must say I had read in all the books about labor that the placenta emerging was the third stage of labor. I honestly don't know why they count that as part of labor. It's so easy. You lay there while she pushes on your belly and it falls right out of you. I thought the placenta was crazy cool though! It looked like a huge heart with a cord attached to it. It was really neat to see. She checked everything on me and no tears! I had birthed out an 8lb 3oz baby with no tearing! That was amazing to me! She said I had trauma to my vagina you know like as would be expected and I would be swollen for a while but that everything looked fantastic. The only other thing she did was push on my belly really hard to get more blood out of my uterus. That part hurt but compared to what I was just going through it was nothing! I got cleaned off and panties and a pad put on and was able to get back in bed with my husband and new son and just enjoy life. She actually bought me a steak dinner that she brought to me right after and I thought that was amazing! That's definitely an experience you don't get anywhere else ;). I ate dinner, had a Dr. Pepper, because I wanted a soda so bad since I hadn't been able to drink caffeine, and Andy and I enjoyed our new son the rest of the night. It was the most amazing thing I have ever done and ever will do. I feel like I could take on the world now! That nothing can stop me because I did the most physically challenging thing a woman can do in her healthy life and I did it without any type of medicinal intervention. Life is amazing!!!!!!